Storied Book Ending?

As I was watching Fox the other day I see a promo for the Cubs/Yankees game.  They billed it as a matchup of two storied franchises.  This got me thinking.  What exactly constitutes a “storied” franchise?  Has anyone ever sat down and thought about this?  When I think storied franchises  the Yankees, Dodgers, Lakers, Celtics, etc. come to mind, but the Cubs?  Hmmmmmmm.  Let’s dissect this a bit.

What defines a storied franchise?  Dictionary.com defines storied as – adjective - recorded or celebrated in history or story.  Ok.  I see Yankees, Dodgers, Lakers, Celtics, Red Sox, Canadians, Red Wings, Packers, Steelers, Cowboys (kills me to say that) as “storied” franchises.  They are the first teams you think of when you think of their respective leagues, whether you like them or not.  Still not sure where the Cubs fit in to this?  What celebrated history do they have?  Nerds with walkmans and Billy Goats?  I also think that the teams I listed above would universally be considered “storied”.  What do they have in common?

1.  Longevity – All of those teams have been around since or pretty close to the beginning of their respective leagues.

2. Multiple titles across multiple generations – Most of those teams have won titles across multiple generations (except possibly the Red Sox but more at that later)

3. Worldwide presence – Ask any fan around the world and most of these teams would be the first named if asked about their respective leagues.

4. Talented/Popular players – These teams have had some of the most talented (Hall of Fame) and most popular (future Hall of Fame) players in the history of their respective leagues.

5. Love/Hate Fan bases – Fans either live and die with these teams or absolutely despise them.  There is no in between.  These teams also pick up the “casual” sports enthusiasts. (i.e. Dallas being “America’s Team”)

Now, we could argue this criteria list (please feel free to do so on the comment board) but for now let’s go with this.  Now will every team fit every category?  No.  The Red Sox were long suffering for their first World Series title since 1918.  The Red Sox did however make it to the brink of a title numerous times, only to have it snatched from them.  I’d say you have to at least hit 4 out of 5. 

Let’s see how the Cubs stack up? 

1. Longevity – The Cubs have been around since 1876 making them one of the oldest franchises in Major League Baseball.  Check.

2. Multiple Titles across Multiple Generations – Seriously?  Do we really have to go there?  Sorry Cubs fans, division titles don’t count.  Your last World Series title was pre-WWI and your last World Series appearance was near the end of WWII.  100% without a doubt no check.

3. Worldwide presence – In a recent survey (2010) the Cubs were the 19^th most popular franchise in the world.  Huh?  Despite my perception and what I believe I will reluctantly give them a check……must be the Europeans.

4. Talented/popular players – The Cubs have had some very talented and popular players.  Ernie Banks, Ryne Sandberg, Ferguson Jenkins, etc.  Ernie Banks was known as Mr. Cub.  Is that something to be proud of?  Sorry Cubbie fans, compared to the other teams on this list, you just don’t stack up.  I award you no check and may Bartman have mercy on your soul.  Truth is, if you are around long enough, the law of averages say you are bound to get some good players eventually.  Just like a blind squirrel is bound to find a nut.

5. Love/Hate fan bases – Once again I’m going to have to argue that the Cubs (as usually is the case with their players) strike out with the game on the line.  Sure there are fans in Chicago but recently the Cubs haven’t even been able to sell out Wrigley.  I’m a diehard Phillies fan (as well as a diehard Philadelphia sports fan).  Everyone knows that Philadelphia fans are known for booing and hating on other teams.  I can honestly say that at a recent Sunday game I didn’t feel any hatred towards the Cubs or their fans I saw.  Furthermore, am I supposed to feel sorry for you because you haven’t won?  Until 2008 the last title I saw was in 1983….when I was 4.  You had the Bulls.  Sorry Chi Town.  No check for you.  At least you have Kanye.

So that’s 2 out of 5 Checks.  Much like your winning percentage this year, .400 is not going to cut it.  This still doesn’t answer the question though.  Why are the Cubs considered “storied”? Is it because they play in a historic stadium?  I don’t think so.  People go to see Wrigley not the Cubs.  Is it because they are lovable losers?  This name really irks me.  Since when do we celebrate losers?  Isn’t this a problem that is hurting society anyway?  Why reward sucking?  Sure it’s kind of comical the way they lose sometimes but it’s not the same as the Red Sox.  You almost felt bad for them or rooted against them when they were losing.  The Cubs?  Again, who cares?  The Cubs have not been relevant since Balki Bartokomous was walking the streets of Chi town doing the Dance of Joy with Cousin Larry.  If losing makes you “storied” then the Phillies should be the most “storied” franchise in the entire world.  I dare you to name another team that has lost more games?  With the possible exception of the Washington Generals?  According to this logic the “storied” franchise list would now include the Bengals, Arizona Cardinals, Clippers, Atlanta Thrashers, Kansas City Royals, Washington Nationals, and Cleveland Indians.  "Remember, fans, Tuesday is Die Hard Night. Free admission for anyone who was actually alive the last time the Indians won the pennant." - Harry Doyle.  I would even argue that Cubs are not even the most “storied” franchise in Chicago.  Besides, who’s afraid of a Cub any way?  So in conclusion Cubs are lovable and cute at the zoo.  Sure Bartman and the curse of the Billy Goat are kind of amusing, but cute, lovable and amusing DO NOT make you “storied”.  Sorry Cubs fans but look on the bright side, there’s always next year…….

Monday Evening 4 pack

U.S. Open

The United States Open was played this past weekend.  Rory McIlroy won it in historic fashion winning by 8 strokes and posted a -16.  I’d like to give a shout out to how classy a guy Rory is.  Despite his epic meltdown at the Master’s, he answered every question and made no excuses.  As he was tearing up Congressional Country Club he was again bombarded with questions about the meltdown and then ultimately comparing his run to that of Tiger Woods.  All Rory did was conduct himself with class and answered every question.  Cheers to you Mr. McIlroy.  Have a pint on me my friend

NFL Lockout

I haven’t mentioned much about the lockout recently because quite frankly right now, I could give a shit.  Is the lockout affecting me right now?  No.  Do I really think that it will last long enough to cancel any games?  No. (Neither side is that stupid…are they?)  Some guys in my ticket group bitched about Jeff Lurie keeping our money and collecting interest right now.  News flash.  Lockout or not they’d still have our money and still would be collecting interest.  This is a boring time during the NFL season.  I really don’t care about secret meetings, lawyers, judges’ rulings, or any other of the he said he said stuff that is going on.  When September 8^th comes and I go to watch Green Bay and New Orleans play and they’re not there, then I’ll worry.  Until then, please spare me the blah blah blah.  Go Phillies!

Weiner

I see that Congressman Weiner resigned.  I just hope it was the decision that he and his wife came to and wasn’t the pressure put on by the other idiots in Congress.  Again, who cares what the man does in his personal life.  I hope it all works out for Mr. Weiner.  By the way, seriously this is his name, and he got in trouble for taking pictures of his….well you see where I’m going with this.  Leave the man alone ladies and gentleman of Congress.  Judging by the state of our country I think you have far more serious things to be concerned about.

Sugar Tax

Well after all the pomp and circumstance I see that the wonderful city council of Philadelphia voted against the sugar tax instead in favor of a one year property tax hike.  What?  So after all that bitching and moaning the “poor” people of Philadelphia are safe.  Hell, so are the rich.  Guess as usual it’s us working class schlubs that have to foot the bill.  Incredible. 

Well there you have it.  Like us on facebook at Obstructed Views and follow us on Twitter @Obs_Views_Blog
Until next time this is Jimbo saying take care and brush your hair.